As I was driving home last night, I passed a couple of kids riding up a steep hill. If they had been on bikes I would have admired their strength and that’s it, but they were riding on Segways, so I had to sort of shake my head and muse.

If you’re not familiar with Segways, they are these two-wheeled devices that look remarkably like lawn mowers, except they’re designed for people to hop on and zoom around as much as 10 or 15 miles an hour. They were designed by Dean Kamen to be the next thing to move people around in, but so far they’ve become things by which mall cops get around from store to store, running down errant shoppers. (I have to admit that when Kamen announced he would be unveiling a new mode of transport, I was really hoping for jetpacks. I am still optimistic that we’ll be flying around on jetpacks by the time I’m an octogenarian. Anyway.)

Nonetheless, Segways are still the newest thing to get around in. Or on. Can’t you see these things replacing, say, bicycles to toodle around Paris in? Can’t you see these things replacing muscle cars, for that matter, for chases in high-octane movies? If you’ve ever seen “What’s Up, Doc” with Ryan O’Neal and Barbra Streisand, there’s a scene in San Francisco, a car chase through those steep hills, running through a Chinatown dragon parade. When I saw those boys on those Segways, I immediately thought of that scene on Segways. Not as much destruction, but it would be hilarious.

And of course I was reading the New York Times this morning, a fashion piece of all things, and I read this passage:

“You can’t help imagining a kind of upside-down remake of “The Wild Ones,” in which a gang of elegant men in knee breeches riding old Raleigh three-speeds descend on an unsuspecting town and freak everyone out with their impeccable manners.”

I nearly snorted my green tea. And that might have been uncomfortable if I had. Different modes of transportation remind us of different things. I’ll always think of Ryan O’Neal and Barbra in a convertible in San Francisco, of Marlon Brando on a motorcycle, of a mall cop on a Segway … even Robert Redford and Paul Newman on an old-fashioned bicycle (actually, I don’t think they ever rode one together. But anyway).

And then as I was a mile away from those boys on the Segways, I wondered: Those things are thousands of dollars. How did those kids get them?!

Eilis Flynn
ECHOES OF PASSION, on sale now

Tags: fashion, jetpacks, movies, New York Times, Segways

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